RELATIONSHIFTS: In keeping with the spirit of sexual knowledge - here’s one to grow on. If you needed another excuse for having safer sex, or if you are seriously thinking something might be wrong with how you feel after sex, it’s time to shed some light on the latest (well, it’s over three weeks old now, so I’m slightly ahead and behind the times) medical/sexual discovery. Five percent of the female population shares an allergy so intimate that it’s been tucked away and shoved under sheets - until now. Well, until it was recently brought out of the bedroom, thanks to the annual meeting of the American College of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology a few weeks back.

This allergy is human seminal plasma hypersensitivity, better known as semen allergy and it’s just enjoyed its fifteen minutes of fame. First noted in a 1958 report by gynecologists, semen allergy went largely ignored until a 1996 University of Cincinnati College of Medicine study. And even then it didn’t get lots of attention. Before this new report a few weeks back, women might not have known that when their pussy was on fire (and not as in the getting tons of action and simply “hot” right now, sort of way), they could have been allergic to his sperm. That’s partially because the symptoms are way too common, and include pain, swelling, redness, hives, wheezing, breathing problems or blisters – (blisters would occur somewhere around 30 minutes after contact), and partially because lots of people had no idea it really existed. But when things get ugly, semen allergy is no laughing matter.

Interestingly enough, there’s a link between semen and food allergies. Women who have the latter are more likely to also have the former. Especially because, as Dr. Jonathan A. Bernstein, lead author of the study points out, food allergies and semen allergies may have similar protein compositions. In other words – you are what you eat.

So what can you do? If you’re not sure what’s causing itchy redness in the V zone, the best way to check for a semen allergy, or any sexually transmitted infection, is to start using condoms. If you’re symptoms go away when you use a rubber, odds are that whatever is causing you to get all itchy and scratchy has something to do with what he’s releasing, or what he’s caught somewhere else. Ah, STI’s - the gift that keeps on giving.  Or it might have to do with the lubes that you’re using (especially if they contain glycerin), your birth control pills, a latex allergy (if you’re already using condoms a lot of the time) or spermicides (which I don’t think you should ever use – Non-oxynol 9 was brought to the United States as hospital disinfectant).

If it is a semen allergy, there are things you can do to treat it. The best thing would be to visit your doctor. Stop in, and let him look at your cookie. You can always get help with an Intravaginal Seminal Graded Challenge. This means that semen is slowly reintroduced into the vagina, first in a very diluted form, and then in the thicker, more phlegm-like form we’ve grown accustomed to swallowing and loving, or at least accepting. And since treatment requires semen, sexual intercourse becomes a key part of the prescription.

Not all women are allergic to the semen itself, some women are allergic to the things that travel in his semen. Things like penicillin and thioridazine and walnuts and Coca-Cola.  So next time you’re not sure what’s brewing below, just remember, you might be allergic to his sperm. Even if the odds are small, the odds are there, and that’s enough to make you aware of the possibility.